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Author name: Kristi Price

why many women are single
Dating

Why Many Women Are Single: The 100% Criteria Conundrum

Ladies, let’s face it. Finding Mr. Right has become almost as complicated as solving a Rubik’s cube while blindfolded. You swipe left more often than a windshield wiper in a rainstorm, all because you’re looking for someone who meets 100% of your criteria. And guess what? You’re not alone! Welcome to the club of perpetually single women who have mastered the art of relationship analysis even before the first date. Here’s a dive into why many women remain single in the age of endless choices. The Perfection Trap Imagine this: You’re scrolling through a dating app, and you come across a guy who’s 90% perfect. But, oh no! He has a cat, and you’re not a cat person. Next! This relentless pursuit of perfection is like searching for a unicorn in a haystack. Spoiler alert: Unicorns don’t exist. In real life, Mr. Right might be Mr. Almost-Right-But-With-A-Cat.  Pre-Date Analysis Paralysis Before you even say “hello,” you’ve already imagined your life together. You’ve analyzed his job prospects, potential for fatherhood, and whether he’ll laugh at your jokes. This pre-date analysis is like planning the wedding before the first date. It’s exhausting and, frankly, a bit counterproductive. Relax! Sometimes, it’s okay not to have the five-year plan mapped out before you know his favorite pizza topping. The Checklist Dilemma The checklist. Ah, the infamous checklist. He must be tall, dark, handsome, have a stable job, love traveling, be good with kids, and, of course, adore your cat. While having standards is great, an impossibly long checklist might just be your romantic undoing. Remember, even Prince Charming probably leaves the toilet seat up sometimes. Fear of Settling vs. Fear of Missing Out The fear of settling is real. No one wants to end up with someone who doesn’t make their heart skip a beat. But on the flip side, the fear of missing out (FOMO) on the next potential match can keep you in a perpetual state of singleness. It’s a delicate balance between finding someone who meets your needs and recognizing that no one is perfect (except maybe Ryan Gosling, but he’s taken). The Overthinking Overload Overthinking is the enemy of spontaneity. What if he’s not serious? What if he’s a serial dater? What if he doesn’t like broccoli on pizza? (Okay, that one’s a dealbreaker for some.) This mental overload can paralyze you before you even give someone a chance. Take a deep breath and remember that dating should be fun, not a strategic chess match. Embrace Imperfection Here’s the kicker: Embracing imperfection might just be the key to finding happiness. The perfect guy might not check every single box, but he might check the ones that matter most. Sometimes, it’s about finding someone whose quirks complement your own, not someone who’s flawless. Conclusion So, ladies, next time you’re tempted to swipe left because he doesn’t have a chiseled jawline or a PhD in astrophysics, give him a chance. You might just find that Mr. Almost-Right-But-With-A-Cat is exactly what you’ve been looking for. After all, love is about finding someone who’s perfectly imperfect for you.

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18 Tips to Make Your Partner Comfortable
Dating

18 Tips to Make Your Partner Comfortable When Visiting

Congratulations! Your partner is coming to visit! That’s wonderful. Whether this is a first visit or part of your routine, there are ways to make your partner feel even more comfortable in your apartment. From dedicating a space to your partner’s items or doing a deep clean of the space, your partner will appreciate the effort when you open the door and they can just relax. We reached out to experts in relationships, including counselors, therapists, and dating coaches to compile the top 18 tips to prepare your space for your partner’s visit. Read on to learn more and impress them the next time they come over. 1. First impressions matter Though you’ve already created a strong foundation with your partner, first impressions are still important to the health of your relationship. When first visiting a space that isn’t their own, you want your partner to feel welcome from the moment they step in the door. “When your partner visits your home it is most important that their first experience of you upon their arrival is that you prioritize acknowledging them,” says Fiachra “Figs” O’Sullivan of Empathi, a therapy service for couples or individuals. “For example, if you are cooking, stop cooking as soon as it is safe to look them in the eyes and greet them enthusiastically. If you are on a call, interrupt the call to greet them, etc., It is most important that your partner receives the message that their presence is your priority and you greet them enthusiastically. Moments of coming together and parting are particularly important to deliver emotional bonding significant messages.” Another thing to keep in mind is to cue into your partner’s body language. They might present as being relaxed through their voice, but their body is transmitting signs of discomfort. As a licensed therapist and co-founder of Crescent Counseling, Amanda Stretcher recommends, “Take cues from their body language and reactions to create a warm atmosphere that feels safe and inviting. Sometimes, it’s the small gestures like adjusting the lighting or offering a comforting hug that can make a big difference.” It’s vital that your partner knows they are welcome in your apartment from the moment they step through the door. “Creating a welcoming space for your partner is key to deepening your connection,” adds Amie the Dating Coach, a Certified Master Life Coach and relationship coach for Los Angeles and Las Vegas. “Set aside a drawer for them, let them know they can leave a set of bathroom toiletries on hand, and stock their favorite snacks in the pantry. These thoughtful gestures show you’re inviting them into your life in a meaningful way, once your relationship has flourished you might consider giving them a key when you are ready.” We’ll dive more into the suggestions Amie brought up throughout the article. 2. Consider your partner’s needs Showing that you are taking into account and care about your partner’s needs is a great way to make them feel welcome. “Considering your partner’s needs will make them feel more at ease,” says Rachele Kehler, a Women’s alignment coach and Human Design guide. “I am a light sleeper, and I immediately felt more at ease in my partner’s place when he provided me with earplugs and a sleep mask!” Take the time to learn what makes your partner most comfortable and try to accommodate those preferences in your apartment. “Everyone has their own comfort preferences, whether it’s the room temperature, lighting, or bed arrangement. Maybe they like extra pillows on the bed or a specific type of tea in the morning. These small adjustments can make a significant impact on how at ease they feel in your space,” says Krysia Szyszlo, founder of Date Your Destiny, an online love and dating coach service aimed towards mid-life singles and based in Toronto. Being proactive is a great way to learn more and make sure you’re meeting your partner’s needs. “Asking and being curious about what your partner would like makes them valued.  Always be curious about their likes and dislikes. Observe your partner’s preferences so you can  surprise your partner with your knowledge of them by having on hand the things they prefer,” shares Dr. Lori Runge, a relationship expert and love coach. “When in doubt, ask them how they would like to be shown that they are cared for. Make sure to be curious about their preferences and do the small little things – they add up and they matter!” 3. Give them a space for them to keep their things If your partner is spending a lot of time at your place, setting aside a space for them to keep their things is a great way to make your partner feel comfortable. “To make your partner feel truly welcome, consider setting up a small space just for them,” says Alpha Attraction, a dating service for singles based in New Zealand. “It could be a dedicated spot in the closet for their clothes, a special drawer, or even a cozy corner with some of their favorite books or magazines. This gesture shows that you’re thinking about their comfort and makes them feel more at home.” When your significant other comes to visit, thoughtfully allocating “real estate” in key areas can make a big difference. “Start by ensuring they have their side of the bed and nightstand area, as well as designated drawer and closet space in the bedroom for their belongings. In the bathroom, provide them with dedicated storage for their toiletries and personal items,” recommends Jen of Jen’s Life Coaching. “Additionally, create a comfortable and organized workspace for their remote work needs, complete with a chair, a small desk, and essential office supplies. These considerations help make their visit more comfortable and enjoyable.” 4. Provide the essentials When your partner comes to visit, they have a lot on their mind. They’re packing clothes, toiletries, books, and other essentials that they might need. Take a load off their mind and prepare a few essentials

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Attraction, Dating, SelfLove

Types of Hugs and Their Health Benefits

Who doesn’t love a great hug? Research shows that hugging is effective at healing disease, sickness, loneliness, anxiety, depression and stress. Hugging can decrease physical pain and help with healing. It can also improve cardiovascular health. But did you know that there are different types of hugs? This article will outline the 7 types of hugs and their health benefits. If you hug another person for 20 seconds or more, oxytocin (the “feel good” hormone) is released and can also affect our endogenous opioid system. Hugging builds trust, a sense of safety, and creates a stronger bond between two people, and guess what? Hugging yourself may even be beneficial. Longer hugs, as well as more hugs, throughout your day can even help with depression and create mental stability. Hugs are so important that there are even professional cuddlers/huggers out there to help. Just be sure to check the reviews on them. What are the 7 types of of hugs? Whatever your style is…hug, hug, hug! Experiment with different styles and learn what you like, what your friends and family like, as well as your romantic partner. Smiles and hugs are free and endless. Don’t forget to use them.   If you need help finding that special someone to hug, schedule a free consultation to see how we can help you.

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Dating, Modern Dating

Dating After Divorce for Men

Many men struggle with dating after divorce (even more than women). Many of my male clients claim they never saw it coming as they were busy providing for their family and were under the impression that they were giving their wife what they desired. Then, seemingly out of nowhere, they were completely blind-sided with the conversation of divorce or the papers themselves. Some wives got caught cheating. Some men knew it was time and left on their own. However it happens, I believe divorce is harder, most times, for men because they feel so alone and abandoned. They typically lose their mutual friends in the divorce and they have let their old friendships fall by the wayside, and now they have no one to come home to and the kids are mostly with the ex. It’s like your ship capsized in the middle of the ocean and the only thing left is your life raft. There isn’t even a paddle to help you navigate these new, unknown, vast waters. Dating after divorce can really be a challenge for men. So where do you start? First, embrace the free time you now have to create a life you love and enjoy. You now have more time to spend on the things that really make you happy or, perhaps, you could learn something new. It’s important during your healing process to take time for yourself. Spend time grieving, but don’t let it consume you. Be good to yourself; incorporate things into your day that bring you joy. What have you always wanted to learn that you didn’t have time for while married? Are there certain hobbies you have always wanted to try? If you have kids, it is a serious adjustment to not see them every day. Fill that time with taking care of yourself and participating in things bring you joy. Many times, divorce is harder on men because they have let their guy friendships fall to the side to spend time with other couples during the marriage. Now is the time to call on old friends (if available) and create new ones. Go to networking events, meetup.com interest groups, running or biking clubs, or cigar lounges (if that is your thing). The main idea is to cultivate new friendships if your old ones have become distant memories. Now is the time to create a wonderful space that you are excited to go home to and spend your time on things you love and with people you enjoy. It’s important not to skip this first step in creating your new best life or you will get stuck in a toxic relationship or a meaningless relationship that just fills a void. Once you are in a good place mentally, it’s time to date! If you haven’t dated in a while, this can be daunting. We’ll start with the easy stuff. Before you even start to date, make sure your house is in order and you know how to dress and make a good first impression. You should have 3-4 date outfits that you can wear in different combinations for different looks. If you struggle with this, hire an image/style consultant or you can go to any big department store and ask for a personal shopper. Then go to a salon or barber and trim things up so you’re date ready. Your smile is so important for creating a lasting first impression so make sure you whiten them! After you’ve completed these steps, you’re ready to meet ladies!  Where are you going to meet single ladies? There are 3 main approaches to dating after divorce in the modern world. Virtual dating, meeting others in person, or hiring a matchmaker to do all the work for you. In this blog, we’ll focus on the first two. There are so many dating sites and apps. My recommendation would be to pick 2-3, at most, as this can be very time consuming. Bumble, Hinge, Match, and Tinder are the most popular. There are always new ones popping up, but they are not as highly saturated with singles and, after all, it’s a numbers game when it comes to meeting women virtually. Many of the ladies won’t respond, they’ll ghost you, or they are scammers. So write an interesting profile, get great photos, and beware of online dating red flags. Where to meet people in person? Networking events, meetup groups, coffee shops – really anywhere you see a lady your style. Meetup.com has a wide range of interest groups including singles groups. Pick a couple interest groups that are aligned with your interests and hobbies. You will not only meet new friends, you will also meet ladies who align with your personality. There are also a lot of speed dating events out there which usually have more women than men. Speed dating is a great way to meet a lot of singles at one time and get a little dating practice. When you are out and about, try to be present. If you see an interesting lady, strike up a conversation. If you are at the grocery store, ask for help. People love helping others, and they won’t feel like you are hitting on them if you are simply asking a question. After divorce, spend time dating to learn what you like before getting into a serious relationship. Just go out there, have fun, and meet new people! Create new friendships with men and women, date and enjoy yourself until you meet the right lady for you.  If you want to chat about how we can help attract the right ladies for you, schedule a free consultation here.

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Dating

Single on Valentine’s Day? Here’s How to Enjoy the Day

February is a difficult time of the year for those who aren’t in a relationship. No matter how happy you are, being single on Valentine’s Day can make you doubt yourself. For those who have recently broken up or who are actively looking for love, it is even harder. The trick is to find ways to enjoy the day. Here are 10 ideas on how to enjoy Valentine’s Day as a single person without spending a fortune. Give Yourself a Gift Just because you are not in a relationship doesn’t mean you can’t get something nice. Pick out something you’ve wanted for a while, whether it be a new smartphone or something new for your home, and gift it to yourself.  Looking to give your lifestyle an upgrade? Consider enrolling in an online degree program to give your career a boost. Online learning is typically more affordable than in-person education, and there are many degrees available whether you want to build your knowledge in business, information technology, nursing, or more.  Treat Yourself to a Pampering There’s no better way to forget about your troubles than to check in at a day spa and let someone massage, exfoliate, and steam them away. Treat yourself to a pampering day, either solo or with some friends, and you’ll soon find it hard to worry much about anything else. You can look for great deals on sites like Groupon.  Go on a Mini-Break The complete anonymity and freedom of solo travel can be a welcome relief from the pressure to be in a relationship during this time of the year. Just avoid the ultra-romantic spots and head for somewhere you’ve always wanted to go — this list of great anti-Valentine’s destinations can help you get inspired. Order a Nice Meal If you live in a city where restaurant delivery is common, you can get all the culinary pleasure of a tasty meal without any of the “eating alone at a restaurant on Valentine’s Day” stigma. What’s more, there are plenty of affordable options to choose from these days. Or Cook One If that’s not an option for you, or if you simply enjoy cooking, it can be fun to make a gourmet meal for one. Look up a nice new recipe, shop for ingredients, set a table with some music you like, and enjoy a sit-down meal by yourself. Alternatively, you can whip up some comfort food and eat it on the couch — whatever floats your boat.  Have a Social Media Detox Valentine’s Day on social media can be rough for singles. Turn off your phone, block all social media on your laptop, and disconnect from it all for the next day or so. If you’re interested in really investing in your mental health, consider a full-on detox over several months. Spend It with Your Friends Bring together your single friends and make a day out of celebrating your friendship together. This article has some fun suggestions, but the idea is to just do whatever you like. Check out the latest exhibit, go to that restaurant you all love, have a sleepover, or challenge yourselves to that fitness class you’ve been talking about.   Go on an Anti-Valentine’s Night The idea of an “Anti-Valentine’s” night is to hang out and make friends rather than look for a potential date. This can remove the pressure to “find someone” which can be a relief.  Have a Movie Marathon What better way to keep you distracted for several hours than to throw yourself into a movie binge? You can either go all in with your favorite selection of romantic films or opt for quirky, funny, and inspirational alternatives like these suggestions from ScreenRant. Or Start a New Series We live in the golden age of streaming, where hundreds of hours of high-quality television are available at the touch of a button. Start one of those shows you’ve been putting off for months or, if you’re lacking inspiration, check out this list of the best shows on Netflix right now. Whatever you do, don’t let the day make you feel bad for being single on Valentine’s Day. You are better off by yourself than in a relationship that doesn’t work, and it’s okay to take some time to be with yourself. If anything, you have an advantage over people in relationships: Valentine’s Day can be as little or as small as you want it to be, and you are fully in control of your day.  Or if you just want to take a break from dating, that’s okay too! Check out my other blog, 6 Ways to Detox from Dating.

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Abusive Relationship

Helping a Friend Through an Abusive Relationship

Helping a friend through an abusive relationship is never easy for anyone involved, but it’s important to keep in mind that their safety is the priority. Getting away from the abuser is the first step, but staying cautious and prepared afterward is part of it, as well. In fact, the chances of a domestic abuse-related homicide go up dramatically after one person has left the relationship, as does the risk for stalking and sexual assault.  Anyone can find themselves in danger from an abusive intimate partner, but it’s estimated that 1 in 3 women experience intimate partner violence/stalking compared to 1 in 4 men in the US. For women who have recently left an abusive situation, knowing how to stay safe is imperative, not just for their physical wellbeing, but for their mental and emotional health as well.  Here are some of the best ways you can help a female loved one stay safe and have peace of mind after leaving a bad situation. Think carefully about where to move One of the first steps an abuse survivor will have to take is moving to a safe place. This means considering many details, such as finding an apartment that includes utilities so your loved one won’t be easy to track down; making friends with the neighbors for an extra measure of security; and looking for a home that isn’t secluded but isn’t necessarily in an easy-to-find spot, either. This can be tricky, especially if your loved one is on a budget, so urge friends and family to be supportive during this time in any way they can. Watch out for social media For those who have recently left an abusive relationship, staying off the grid as much as possible is the name of the game. Social media, therefore, is a bad idea. It gives anyone and everyone the ability to look up personal facts about you or even track your comings and goings; even if your loved one isn’t active on social media, their friends can tag them at locations if they have an account. It’s much better in the long run to either stay away from these platforms altogether or to have a private account with no real names or photos used.  Secure the home Help your loved one go through her home and upgrade the safety features; thick windows with extra locks, metal doors with deadbolts, motion-sensor lights on the perimeter, and a security camera that sends a live feed to a smartphone or laptop are all great places to start. For a little more money, she can also install a security system that will automatically call the police if an intruder is detected. And encourage her to have locks rekeyed or additional deadbolts installed for additional protection. Help her connect with a local locksmith through a site like Angi. Ideally, find someone who understands the need for discretion and expediency.  If your loved one is worried about her former partner retaliating, urge her to find a home or apartment with a garage so her car will stay safe, or a building that has a guard or gate with a passcode. She might also want to make sure her smoke detectors are in good working order. Think about those accounts Your loved one will need to think about any accounts she had open while she was with her former partner–bank accounts, credit cards, etc.–and either change them over or change all the security settings on them. She should always assume that the abuser will remember PIN numbers or passwords. Joint accounts should be closed out, if possible, or simply not used.  Helping a friend get through an abusive relationship will require patience and love. Help her feel safe by assisting her in making sure her home is secure and that she can move on with her life. It won’t be easy, but with some preparation, she can at least have a little peace of mind. Check out the following blog for tips with dealing with Covert Verbal Abuse.

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